Presenting now, some of the most important UNWRITTEN RULES of public bathrooms.

Scoff not.  Dismiss me not.  Make no mistake about it, these are VERY REAL rules that must be followed to the letter for the good of all society.  A nation built on common decency demands it.

I am therefore moved (I assure NO pun intended) to codify and present these rules. Many of you are already adherents to the rules, and may ignore them  However, please feel free to pass them along to any friend, family member or professional colleague you fear may be in violation.  Local rules accepted, you also wish to post these rules in the facility in which the majority of your noted violations occur.

Remember;  there is nothing worse than someone in a public bathroom who doesn't understand the UNWRITTEN RULES of using a public bathroom.   Here are eight of the most popular picks for the key unwritten rules of using a public bathroom.  If you're not following any of them . . . start.

1.  Don't look through the crack into a stall.

2.  Don't talk to strangers about ANY subject.

3.  In a men's room, pick the urinal furthest away from someone else.

4.  No grunting.

5.  In a women's room, if you're at the sink and someone's in a stall and not peeing, hurry up and leave.  She clearly wants to poop but is waiting until you leave.

6.  No laughing at loud noises coming from the stalls.

7.  Wipe the seat if you splashed on it.

8.  Flush.  And then flush a second time if you have to.

For the good of us all, I thank you for your kind consideration of these rules.

And now for something completely different!

Please be SURE to join us tomorrow at K-Drive Greenhouse.  We'll be there digging on everything that's green and growing from 10 until Noon.